Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Sweet Pea, Pumpkin Pie

My Dear Rita,

You are three now. I can't even believe but I am just so enjoying many of the changes that have come with your third birthday.
Momma! I want to exercise with you!
You are so verbal and well spoken and do you ever have every confidence in sharing how you feel. Just the other night over supper this conversation occurred:

Tyler: Rita, you do not talk back to Momma. Now, go and tell her you are sorry.
Rita: Hmm...No thank you.

I'm learning how to care for you while learning to care for myself. And my sweet girl, this is so much harder than I could have imagined but my heart burns and aches with love for you! Right now me and Dada are talking about how you are just the sweetest girl.

Sometimes I'm really impatient with you, and my yelling is too much. (It hurts just to type that.) I try to ward-off the cranky momma monster, but after a night of little people in and out of me and Dada's bed and preparing food four or five times a day and keeping our "big beautiful house," as you say, reasonably clean and making time to read and play with you and Jonah, well, shucks, I get frustrated when I hand you your PJ pants to put on, and you run the other way squealing. But those moments are so critical Rita. I'm learning every day to be more patient, to maybe chase you for a minute, rather than letting myself get frustrated and then I make my request to you again. It's so delightful how light-hearted you are. You really amaze me and I enjoy you so much. I know Jesus is teaching me how to care for your spirit. Thank you for your patience as I work harder at being a more gentle and patient momma. Thank you for showing me the mercy of Christ. You desire His joy for me and that really really touches the depths of my heart. I'm so humbled by how wonderfully and purely you love.

Your laugh, your squeal, your love of outside, your love for strawberries and blueberries, the way you exclaim with joy when we bake together (especially bread!), how you lock eyes with me and tell me "I yuv you so much Momma. I yuv you so much." How just yesterday, as Dada let me drift off to sleep to nap on the sofa, you came to "kiss my sweet Momma" and Jo followed your lead.

Oh, you and Jonah! What a pair! You delight in one another, play so very well together, and already both of you are so crazy over the new baby brother in my womb. Do you know Rita, God-willing, this baby boy will be here in under 10 weeks? You helped me and Dada choose the name for this baby. Only one name out of the eight or nine we really considered stuck with you - and before we knew it we were addressing this baby by that same name. How incredible!

You are doing ballet now, as of your third birthday, and you really really love it. And I'm so glad! Jonah and I just hang-out while you dance. We love to watch the TV and giggle over your enthusiasm! Your teacher is strict, but you really do like her, and ask to go to ballet almost every day of the week. Dada really wanted this for you - and I'm so glad about it too!

You are sunshine in my day when you wake up and want to be held, cuddling into my arms wearing your long-sleeve flannel nightgown. Or how we sometimes share a cup of coffee milk and talk about how you slept and the dreams you had. Sweet memories in the making. You love to help me move laundry from the washer to the dryer and you enjoy comparing the handfuls of clothes:
Towels and a shirt: "Oh momma, this is a BIG lotsa (lots of) clothes."
A few socks: "Oh momma, this is a tiny piece of clothes."

You enjoy Little Bear books and the TV shows and have a blast playing Little Bear adventures - and I love watching and listening as Little Bear's adventures morph into your own adventures. You are also crazy over Curious George - and have been for almost two years!

You have memorized the book The Carrot Seed and Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do you see?
You like to pretend you are the violet cat, Jo is the goldfish, Dada the green frog and me the teacher. We love playing with you!

Momma! Take my picture!
Today we played and you were Princess Bees-ba, Jo was King KiKi, and I was a fairy. You asked me to tell you my name, so I chose Fairy Fleur. The names you come-up with are hysterical - as though you have Viking blood in you! Your first three barbies you named Greeva, Feeva and Cheeva. And you stand by those names!

Outside time in the garden really captivates you - for supper we cut greens from the garden and you carried them in the colander, into the house all by yourself! You are just so fantastic.

Surprised about something - I can't remember what it was! Maybe a lawnmower?! 
It's time for bed now my girl. I love you so much. Every day I get to know you more. Please keep praying your sweet prayers for me. Please keep asking Mary and Jesus "to help Momma not to yell" and never stop reminding me to "Look momma, look at Mary and Jesus. See, they are not yelling."

As I grow alongside Dada, I also grow with you and learn with you each day. I'm hoping we can paint tomorrow, and I know I should tell you after breakfast, because otherwise you will be too excited to eat! :)

I love you, I love you. I love you. I hope that as we grow I am always someone you can confidently approach and totally trust.

Thank you for teaching me the beauty of love and forgiveness. Thank you for showing me that I am worthy of love, despite however imperfect I may be.

Forever and always you are my sweet pea and my pumpkin pie.


  1. Your family is so beautiful! Rita will love reading this in a couple years :)

  2. What a sweet little girl and a sweet post! I think I yell the most when the kids were between 30 months and 4. Those are just very trying years.


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