Thursday, May 9, 2013

Productive Silence

Organic Sweet Potato Slips, started from one we purchased
Good morning!  Good day!  Good evening!

Where to start?

I'm sitting in a coffee shop to blog.



But so fruitful.

Early mornings on the front porch, as I gather myself and create a bit of order
We (loathsome groan) have iPhones and both agreed that the amount of money we spend on cell phone service each month is absurd.  But we are waiting the 12 months (maybe more) until our contracts expire.  So, to save money in the meantime, we canceled internet service.  We each have a bit of data to use each month, but it isn't enough for me to be present in the online community that I was plugged into.

I'm hopeful to jump back in.

Time to myself is so precious.

My first true chicken salad.  Divine!!!!
I used to be really crazy about being with my children allllllll allllll allllll the time.  But it is so good to have time to breathe, enjoy, walk without tripping on a moving baby, sip a cup of coffee without precious little hands dangerously yanking it from my grip.

It's so good to just be.

Motherhood is amazing, amazing.  It is equally exhausting this go-round.  I never realized how great of a sleeper Rita was, but now I do!

Thoughts that I have been gnawing on:

completely weaning Rita
weaning Jonah
Homemade Mayonnaise, still very much a work in progress
and only 50% chance of success as of now
starting EC (elimination control) with Jonah
potty training Rita

Do you see that my entire identity is my children?

I'm naive and young BUT I know this much: I have to still be me amidst child-rearing.

So I'm reading again! I recently finished Bringing Up Bebe and am now reading How Eskimos Keep Their Babies Warm and Other Adventures in Parenting.

Hahaha!  Yes!  I'm reading books about parenting my children, but herein lies a delicately fine line...because my college degree is in Early Childhood Education, so my vocation/job also happens to be my passion!

Stories with Mamzie
Although cleaning Rita's poop out of the bathtub last night was not at ALL up my alley...and poor heart she heard way too much fussing from me on that incident.  I was so in need of a time-out before scouring the tub and talking to Rita.  Tyler offered to do both, but of course I was stubborn!

Anyway, back to how I'm preserving myself:

I'm also reading a bit about my chickens.

I'm building a chicken tractor/moveable coop from pallets (!!!!!).

First peach of the season!
Experimenting in the kitchen.

Baking again!  We used to bake on Wednesdays, then I have read about how the French bake on Saturdays...WHAT A DIFFERENCE!  Tyler is home to help with the care of Jo and me and Rita get to enjoy special time together.

Sometimes I talk about going to work outside of the home.  Being alone is hard for me.  Some people say it only gets harder but I more often hear that you grow into motherhood.  Meanwhile, I really love being able to indulge in my kiddos interests, cultivate friendships alongside the kids, and visit Tyler at work.  Especially visit Tyler at work.  I just love every minute I get with him.

Celebrating at a festival
I think I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel now and again.  It's just tough having two babies.  Take a deep breath for me will ya?  I'm a perfectionist and an extrovert.  I'm learning to live life, rather than accomplish a to-do list, and that is why my silence here has been so productive.

1 comment:

  1. glad to hear from you again! :)

    i have to say, that one of the few positives to working part-time is that i do get a "break" - not my ideal break by any means but i do find i'm less burnt out than my friends who do not work. but honestly, i'd rather just stay home all the time (but that's probably got something to do with my temperament).

    aaaaand the iPhone. i've been considering getting rid of mine, mainly because of the cost buuuuut i've realized that the extra we pay for me to have a smartphone pays for itself - i'm able to get a lot of cheap/free stuff with mobile coupons. plus the GPS thing has saved me a million times (and i've wasted less gas).

    i'd also suggest (if you haven't already) to look into another internet provider. we recently switched and are paying less than half of what we were paying before!


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